The In Between. Navigating the Liminal Space
I’ve been sitting in the liminal space for some months now, possibly even years. The liminal space of change is one of life’s most profound and transformative phases, yet it’s also one of the most challenging. This space — sometimes defined as the threshold between two points, identities, or life chapters — is where the familiar fades, but the new has not yet emerged. It’s a place of uncertainty, often marked by discomfort, confusion, and sometimes fear. However, it’s also where growth, healing, and self-discovery can happen at an accelerated rate, allowing for the development of resilience, clarity, and transformation. Embracing this liminal space with awareness can change everything about how we experience life’s inevitable transitions.
Understanding Liminal Space
In anthropology, liminality describes the middle stage of a rite of passage, where the initiate is “betwixt and between,” separated from their old role but not yet integrated into a new one. Applied to personal transformation, liminality represents those periods when we are no longer who we were, yet not quite who we will become. These spaces can arise from many life changes, including divorce, job shifts, illness, a move, or personal growth transitions, and the more profound the change, the more intense the liminal experience.
In a culture that celebrates certainty and control, the liminal space is often resisted or misunderstood. We want to “move forward,” fix things, or return to comfort as quickly as possible. But rushing through this space denies its essential purpose — to allow us to dismantle old structures, explore new possibilities, and build a foundation for a future that resonates deeply with who we are becoming.
The Emotional Landscape of Liminality
Being in a liminal space can feel like standing in the fog; the way forward isn’t clear, and the old path has vanished. This ambiguity stirs up a range of emotions — often confusion, doubt, grief, excitement, fear, and, ultimately, a strange sense of freedom. People might feel as though they’re “falling apart” or “losing themselves,” but in reality, they are shedding aspects of themselves that no longer align with who they are becoming.
For those of us who thrive on structure and predictability, these moments can be unsettling. We might feel frustrated with ourselves for not “having it all together” or feel ashamed of being in a state of flux. Society often encourages us to get over change as quickly as possible, but embracing the emotional landscape of liminality can be profoundly healing. Allowing ourselves to feel these emotions, process them, and let them shape us is where true transformation occurs.
Resistance and Surrender in Liminality
One of the most challenging aspects of liminality is the temptation to resist. We often try to hold on to remnants of our old lives, identities, and routines, believing they offer comfort or familiarity. This resistance is natural; after all, stepping into the unknown is daunting. But holding on too tightly to what’s no longer serving us only prolongs the discomfort.
Surrender, on the other hand, is the pathway through the liminal space. It’s about releasing the urge to control every aspect of our journey and allowing the process to unfold organically. Surrender isn’t about giving up; it’s about giving in to the process, trusting that what lies on the other side of this threshold will be more aligned and fulfilling than the structures we’re leaving behind. Surrender might look like engaging in practices that bring calm to the mind, such as mindfulness, journaling, or spending time in nature, which create space for the process to unfold without interference.
Identity and Ego in Transition
Liminal spaces challenge our sense of identity. For example, someone who has built their life around their career may feel lost after retirement. Or a person who identified as part of a couple might feel as though they have lost themselves after a breakup. In this space, our ego — the part of ourselves that clings to labels and identities — often feels threatened, as it must release these old forms and open to the possibility of new ones.
This release can be uncomfortable and even frightening, but it’s a necessary part of transformation. As we strip away outdated aspects of our identity, we open ourselves to a new way of being, one that is not defined by titles or labels but by the essence of who we truly are. In the liminal space, there’s an opportunity to examine what aspects of our identity are authentic and what has been shaped by societal expectations, family, or past experiences.
Building Resilience in the Unknown
Navigating the liminal space builds resilience. Each time we step into the unknown, we have an opportunity to strengthen our inner resources and our capacity to manage change. Resilience in this context isn’t about “toughening up” but rather developing a flexible mindset that allows us to adapt to change without losing our sense of self. We learn to release rigid beliefs, open ourselves to new perspectives, and find peace in the uncertainty.
One way to cultivate resilience is to view the liminal space as a period of exploration. By shifting our perspective from fear of the unknown to curiosity about what we might discover, we allow ourselves to lean into the experience rather than shrink from it. Acknowledging that it’s okay to not have all the answers and to be in a state of “not knowing” can be liberating. We can befriend our questions, explore our doubts, and let curiosity guide us through the darkened corridors of change.
Growth in the Liminal Space: Finding the Authentic Self
When we allow ourselves to dwell in liminality, we often uncover deeper truths about ourselves. Without the distractions of our usual roles and routines, we’re given a chance to reconnect with our authentic self — the part of us that exists beyond our roles, achievements, and labels. In this sense, the liminal space can be seen as a return to the self, a stripping away of the inauthentic layers we’ve accumulated over time.
In this space, we may discover passions, values, and dreams that we had previously buried or ignored. We begin to understand what truly matters to us and what we need to feel fulfilled. This newfound clarity forms the foundation for a life that aligns more closely with our inner truth. Living authentically doesn’t mean we’ll never face challenges, but it does mean we’ll be living in alignment with our values, making us more resilient to future changes.
Embracing Uncertainty and Impermanence
The liminal space teaches us that life is inherently uncertain and ever-changing. Embracing this truth can be both humbling and liberating. When we stop clinging to the need for certainty, we become more adaptable, resilient, and open to the flow of life. This shift in perspective is often a central part of spiritual growth, as it invites us to trust in the impermanent nature of life and see change as a natural, even beautiful, process.
By accepting that the only constant in life is change, we’re able to let go of our attachment to specific outcomes and instead focus on how we’re showing up in each moment. This acceptance can feel like a weight lifted, freeing us from the pressure to control the uncontrollable and allowing us to experience life as it unfolds.
Emerging on the Other Side: The Transformation
Eventually, the liminal space gives way to a new beginning, and we emerge from it transformed. The experience may have changed us in ways that are both subtle and profound. We might feel a deeper connection to ourselves, a stronger sense of purpose, or a renewed commitment to living in alignment with our truth. In many cases, the journey through liminality reveals inner resources we didn’t know we had, gifts we might have overlooked, and perspectives we might have ignored.
This transformation is often the “rebirth” that follows the symbolic death of the liminal space. It’s a moment of integration, where the lessons, insights, and growth that emerged in the in-between can now be woven into the fabric of our lives. The new life we step into may not look exactly as we had envisioned, but it’s often one that’s more fulfilling and authentic than what we left behind.
Carrying the Lessons Forward
The wisdom gained in liminal spaces doesn’t just apply to that one period of change; it becomes a lifelong toolset. Having moved through the discomfort and uncertainty once, we know we can do it again. We become less afraid of the unknown, more adaptable to change, and more trusting of ourselves. We carry forward a deeper understanding of ourselves and a greater capacity to embrace life’s transitions with grace and resilience.
The liminal space of change is both a challenge and a gift. It invites us to question, to explore, and to transform. Though we may resist it at times, leaning into this space with openness allows us to emerge with greater clarity, purpose, and inner strength. By viewing change as a journey rather than a destination, we can honor the liminal spaces as sacred thresholds that shape and guide us toward becoming our truest selves. As we learn to trust this process, we build the resilience to embrace each new chapter, knowing that the space between is where the magic of transformation truly happens.
